A Finn Update

It's been a white since I've posted an update on our main man Finn. I can't believe it, but he is going to be two in 3 months! It's hard to believe I will have a two year old, once they hit two, they aren't really babies anymore, they're little people.

We haven't been to many specialists lately and haven't had any tests done within the last 6 months or so. We just stick to our regular appointments. It's been a really nice break, that first year of Finn's life we were at the doctor, hospital or some type of clinic two to three times a week. It took a lot out of us. These last few months we've just been enjoying Finn and watching him grow and learn more things. He is still with early intervention, which is physical, occupational, and visual therapy. We also take him to another physical therapist once a month. They are all helping him and they're teaching us ways to help him learn new things and gain strength.

Lately Finn has been catching on to new skills. In October, he rolled over for the first time! I honestly thought I was going to explode with excitement and tears all at the same time. And since then he's been rolling all over, but only to his left. If he and Zoolander could get together and share some of their turning skills I think we'd have it made. He is holding his head up so well and his trunk is getting stronger too. He can sit up all on his own in his bumbo seat and he also has a saucer that he likes to sit and play in.

We haven't had much improvement with his eyes. It seems like he is trying to look more, I can tell when he's looking at me, but his eyes get tired quickly and he looks down or turns away. I'm just glad he's putting forth the effort. I think if we could fix just one thing it would be his eyes. I want so badly for him to be able to see his world clearly and without struggle.

Finn has been grasping objects better and likes to feel and touch things. He will hold things in his hands for long periods of time, when he used to drop them immediately, almost like he didn't realize there was anything in his hand. He seems like he wants to explore things more with his senses, when he hears an interesting sound or a new voice he gets very still and listens closely, and sometimes, if he likes what he hears he'll give a little smile. He still loves music more than anything. He smiles and tries to sing a long when we play any kind of music, his favorite is still indie/folk bands with good guitar and soft voices.

Next up for Finn (and us) is another MRI. He was only 5 or 6 months old the first time we had an MRI done and because he was so young his brain we very immature so there wasn't much they could see. Now that he is older his brain is more mature and if there is something wrong they will be able to tell much easier. We are planning on having the MRI around his second birthday, so within the next few months or so. I don't really know how I feel about it. With all of Finn's tests they've all come back normal so my expectations are very low with this next one. It's kind of a catch 22. It's nice when they come back normal but it'd also be nice if they found something and we could get a diagnosis in the chance that we could help him. But either way, it's in God's hands and we're leaving it all up to Him.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, Finn has been a wonderful teaching tool for us. We've learned so much about ourselves and life and God. It's not perfect. Finn isn't perfect. No child is perfect. Children are messy, loud, and unpredictable. People call their children wonderful, perfect "little angels", but they aren't angels. They aren't supposed to be. I watched a wonderful TED talk a while back. The woman giving the speech said, children are wired for struggle as soon as they are born. When we hold those perfect little babies in our arms, our job isn't to say "Look at him, he's perfect. Let's keep him perfect and not let anything bad happen to him." our job is to say, "You know what? You are imperfect and you're wired for struggle but you're worthy of love and belonging." It's our job to love them and teach them. And in the process, they're probably going to teach us more than we'll teach them. Although they are messy and loud and bla bla bla, they bring so much joy. It's hard but it's worth it. Finn is hard sometimes, but he's so worth it.

I watch Finn and I'm amazed at what he CAN do. He can eat so well, he's never had a problem with that. He eats whatever we give him and he can chew and swallow with no problems. He can give us sass. He has the funniest personality and sometimes he can be a little punk, but it totally cracks me up. I just love this kid and I'm so glad he's mine, I'm so glad God let me have him and I'm glad Noah and I can raise him together. I feel really lucky.